Taking a break from love

I’ve been on several more bad dates and I feel like I’ve lost the initiative. More and more I am just waiting for the night to end. I feel like I’ve had a lifetime of conversations about jobs, aspirations and childhood memories. It’s not that the guys I’ve been out have been boring, but it seems that I’m not so sure of what I’m looking for anymore. I’m 26 years old now and while many still think I’m young, I feel like I’m 36. I suspect that I’m getting burned out from all the effort into sparking my love life that I’m no longer feel like I’m alive. So I’ve made a decision. I’m just not going to focus on my love life. I think I’ve been putting too much pressure on myself to feel a part of something or somebody.

Last week, I saw a really interesting play called “The Ladies of the Corridor” by Dorothy Parker. It’s basically a play about these older women living in a hotel waiting to die. And they are so adamant about keeping busy with their day to day life that they become boring. The main character is this wealthy, recently widowed woman by the name of Lulu Ames. She eventually falls for a younger man and life is wonderful, but since she does not work, she sits at home and broods about her lover. She is a perfect example of a someone who puts so much pressure on herself that in the end she becomes a cruel sugar mama and her boy runs away.

What does this play tell me? Keep life fun. Keep your mind active. Engage yourself with interesting activities. Talk to different people. Find out what their story is. I think dating now has become a race to the end of the night, and that’s a real shame. So I’ve decided to take a break from love. I’m not going to spend my evenings mining the data troves of match.com or eharmony.com just for a reason to do something the next night. I’m going to go to the movies by myself. I’m going to watch more plays and I think I’m going to go join a dinner club. We’ll see what happens. To be continued…